Dare to love....

If we could see through His eyes Then we could dare to love the way God loves If we could see through His eyes Then we would understand the way God understands For His eyes see through the surface right down to our needs Far beyond where we are to where we can be If we could only see through His eyes

JOURNEY

Journey. It's a word that has come up in my blog, in my conversations lately, and in emails. It is a word that means so much, that feels so much. To the dictionary, it means traveling from one place to another, usually taking a rather long time. a distance, a course or period of travel; passage or progress from one stage to another. While all these are so, to me it means more. It means not always knowing where I'm going to end up, not always understanding the direction my Map is telling me to go, It means feeling lost but trusting my GPS, it means feeling lonely, but knowing I'm not alone. It means trudging through valleys because they are what divides the mountaintops. It means perseverance It means hope It means faith It means trusting that God's Grace is sufficient It means being still & waiting for direction. I don't know about you, but waiting is one of the hardest things for me to do. I used to work at a bookstore, & while there a book lighted upon the shelves. It caught me by the heart. It was titled Wait. Just a little book with a poem & some photos. What a way to catch my attention than to put two of my hearts loves (poetry & photography) together. And with such a powerful message at that. I was only 17 or so, but it struck such a chord in my life. And many times I find the words running through my mind. Here it is....

Wait by Russell Lee Kelfer

Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried; Quietly, patiently, lovingly, God replied. I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate . . . And the Master so gently said, "Wait."

"Wait? you say wait?" my indignant reply. "Lord, I need answers, I need to know why! Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard? By faith I have asked, and I'm claiming your Word.

"My future and all to which I relate Hangs in the balance, and you tell me to wait? I'm needing a 'yes', a go-ahead sign, Or even a 'no' to which I can resign.

"You promised, dear Lord, that if we believe, We need but to ask, and we shall receive. And Lord I've been asking, and this is my cry: I'm weary of asking! I need a reply."

Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate, As my Master replied again, "Wait." So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut, And grumbled to God, "So, I'm waiting for what?"

He seemed then to kneel, and His eyes met with mine . . . and He tenderly said, "I could give you a sign. I could shake the heavens and darken the sun. I could raise the dead and cause mountains to run.

"I could give all you seek and pleased you would be. You'd have what you want, but you wouldn't know Me. You'd not know the depth of my love for each saint. You'd not know the power that I give to the faint.

"You'd not learn to see through clouds of despair; You'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there. You'd not know the joy of resting in Me When darkness and silence are all you can see.

"You'd never experience the fullness of love When the peace of My spirit descends like a dove. You would know that I give, and I save, for a start, But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart.

"The glow of my comfort late into the night, The faith that I give when you walk without sight. The depth that's beyond getting just what you ask From an infinite God who makes what you have last.

"You'd never know, should your pain quickly flee, What it means that My grace is sufficient for thee. Yes, your dearest dreams overnight would come true, But, oh, the loss, if you missed what I'm doing in you.

"So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see That the greatest of gifts is to truly know me. And though oft My answers seem terribly late, My most precious answer of all is still . . . Wait."

So as I sit & wait (although sometimes I admit I get impatient) I remember that Yes, God's grace is sufficient for me. & even thought the journey at times is hard, painful even. I know without a doubt that God is doing a work in my life, that I would not want to miss. God said, "My presence will go with you. I'll see the journey to the end." (Exodus 33:14) And that my friends will make this journey worthwhile.

Spring Cleaning

Now I'm sure the thought of those words send all you domestic ladies into a dither. -Thoughts of wiping down walls, -moving furniture around so you can sweep wall to wall, -Cleaning out the "junk closet" (wait, do other people even have them?), -Spit shining the silver and washing windows. Me? I just think that maybe for once my house will get completely cleaned in one week. I know, it sounds like my house must be full of dust bunnies and dingy windows, & honestly sometimes it is. What can I say I work full time, and live by Rt 23. The inside doesn't always get cleaned & those front windows with the lovely grime? Maybe this week...maybe. This past weekend, I decided that it is time for Spring Cleaning, & not necessarily house cleaning. Everything is getting cleaned out & organized. Finances - oh yes the dreaded cant live with it, cant live without it budget. Sadly it has gotten neglected the last few months. And then, last night I discovered that my computer has a nice little template on it to help me organize the budget. I was so excited I stayed up way to late figuring it out. That's the second thing that needs spring cleaned - or just discipline. Getting to bed at a normal hour & using time wisely. Next on the list is Meal Prep. I NEED to start planning my meals - healthy meals. Since I can tend to be an excuse-y-ish person, I will make some here: -I never did much cooking before I was married. I worked till 5, came home & mom normally had supper pretty much ready. So therefore I lack experience. (can i still claim that after 1 1/2 yrs of being married?) -Secondly my husband is lactose intolerant...no milk, cheese, sour cream, butter, cream cheese....(there is a kind of milk that he can have for when i need to use it in something) -Thirdly, my husband does not eat most vegetables. So instead of making corn every night, or just a vegetable for me, I sometimes skip it. I know, I know, how un-wifey of me. So aside from these excuses, I'm about to embark on a journy of healthy cooking. Anyone with ideas for me, please give! I'm accepting every idea that doesn't include liver & onions. :) And yes, also on my spring cleaning list is my house. Inside & outside. I dream of that perfect house, that never has clutter, never gets junk mail, no need for "storage" closets or better yet "junk closets". & little by little, room by room, my aim is to get there....before it needs to be called Summer Cleaning. Till next time You can find me with the bald headed guy. (Mr Clean, silly people! my husband's not bald!)

Forget Me Not....Vicki Hinze

Carjacked & beaten, "Susan" awakes with no knowledge of who she is or where she came from. The only thing she assumes is that her name is Susan. This she knows because of a piece of paper stuck in her pocket. In her search to discover who she is, it becomes apparent that she is being hunted by someone. Working with Benjamin Brandt, owner of the Crossroads Crisis Center, she begins to piece her life together, discovering that she is not Susan at all. She has no memory, or money; however she has a deep seated faith in God, and rely's on Him to show her the answers to her life. This book was provided for review by Waterbrook Multnomah Press.

Here burns my candle... Liz Curtis Higgs

I have to admit I don't often pick up a historical fiction & become enthralled in it's pages. However, this book held onto me. Follow the struggle of a down to earth highlander who marries above her station. Alone in so many ways- little in common with her mother-in-law, or sister -in-law, worshiping a secret god, far away from her family. As God works, & pulls her into a relationship she becomes a force to reckon with. Her new found faith in God gives her strength in the middle of a war, to become a pillar for her family. Liz weaves the story of Ruth against the backdrop or war-torn Scotland in a way that makes you feel as if you are walking the streets. So much that when reading the book to myself it had a tinge of a Scottish accent. :) Overall a good read, making me wish a sequel was available now. This book was provide for review by Waterbrook Multnomah Press Go here to get your copy!

a cool poem...

Read as written the following poem is a sad picture of much of society today. Read in reverse, it shows the hope & power a person has to change it. Came across this recently & thought it was pretty neat. Lost Generation I realize this may be a shock, 'Happiness comes from within' is a lie, and 'Money will make me happy' So in thirty years I will tell my children they are not the most important thing in my life. My employer will know that I have my priorities straight because work is more important than family I tell you this Once upon a time Families stayed together but this will not be true in my era this is a quick fix society Experts tell me Thirty years from now I will be celebrating the 10th anniversary of my divorce I do not concede that I will live in a country of my own making In the future Environmental destruction will be the norm No longer can it be said that My peers and I care about this earth It will be evident that My generation is apathetic and lethargic It is foolish to presume that There is hope. And all of this will come true unless we choose to reverse it.

Raw...

The last couple months of my life, have been a journey of epic proportions. I can only remember one other time in my life, where I have struggled, and fought, and clawed this hard to figure out if what I believe in is the same thing as Who I believe in. I have always prayed that I would never endure heartache like that again. And I haven't for the most part. Back then, I searched the internet over to see if there was anyone else who had discovered the kind of emotional pain, that physically hurt. I didnt find any scientific proof, but I still believe it. The last few months, I have learned once again, that Who I believe in will always trump what I am going through. I've cried, I've prayed, I've fought, I almost gave up almost but between me & God, I picked up where I left off and struggled some more. My strong wall of emotions became a landslide of raw emotion. and in the raw place, my heart open and bleeding on an autopsy table of what felt like failure, God reached in. To a place that I dont think He has ever been before. I'm still struggling, I'm still confused, I'm not sure what the right way to fight is anymore It's still raw, but God is there. He's not gonna let the life drain from me as I fight. And sometimes, God doesn't just fix things for us. Sometimes He lets us live with battle scars. Not because He doesnt care, but because He wants us to remember the fight, and remind us that there are things worth fighting for. I'm still on this epic journey, but I am not alone. And I'm going to be ok. I know it.